Money Scripts—Part 2: How to Rewrite the Script

Understanding why we behave the way we do with money is the first step toward transforming our relationship with it. In Part 1 of this series, we explored the concept of money scripts—the unconscious beliefs about money that shape our financial decisions. We also examined four dominant money scripts: money status, money worship, money avoidance, and money vigilance.

These scripts are not inherently good or bad. However, when we operate on autopilot, they can lead us into financial habits that don’t serve us well. The good news? You can take control of your money script and reshape it in ways that support your financial goals and overall well-being. In this second part of the series, we’ll focus on practical strategies to break free from unhelpful patterns and build a healthier financial mindset.

Breaking Free from Money Status Thinking

People with a money status script often equate their self-worth with their net worth. This can lead to overspending, accumulating debt, or an ongoing need to impress others.

To shift away from this mindset:

  • Create space before big purchases. When you feel the urge to buy something expensive, pause and ask yourself: Am I buying this for myself, or am I trying to impress someone? Delaying a purchase can help you gain clarity.

  • Redefine success. Remind yourself that financial well-being isn’t about what you own but about financial security, freedom, and peace of mind.

  • Consider the hidden costs. The Jones-es may have flashy lifestyles, but they may also have hidden debt. Focusing on your financial health, rather than appearances, is far more rewarding in the long run.

Counteracting Money Worship

If you have a money worship mindset, you may believe that more money will solve all your problems or that happiness is just one raise away. While financial stability can reduce stress, research shows that happiness levels plateau once a person’s basic needs and moderate comforts are met.

To break the cycle:

  • Shift your focus to experiences. Studies show that spending money on meaningful experiences—travel, hobbies, time with loved ones—brings more long-term joy than accumulating material possessions.

  • Define what 'enough' looks like. Instead of constantly chasing more, ask yourself: What level of financial security would truly satisfy me? Establishing clear goals helps prevent endless striving.

  • Practice gratitude. Regularly appreciating what you have today can keep you from believing that happiness lies just beyond your next paycheck.

Overcoming Money Avoidance

People with a money avoidance script often see money as negative or associate wealth with greed. This can lead to neglecting finances, avoiding budgets, or feeling guilty about making and spending money.

To develop a healthier relationship with money:

  • Schedule regular money check-ins. Set aside 15 minutes each week to review your finances—check your bank account, track expenses, or revisit your budget. Familiarity reduces fear.

  • Reframe your mindset. Money is simply a tool. It’s neither good nor bad—it’s what you do with it that matters. Consider the positive ways financial security can help you and those around you.

  • Challenge limiting beliefs. If you think money is bad, ask yourself: Who benefits from me believing this? Recognizing where these beliefs come from can help you let go of them.

Balancing Money Vigilance

Being money vigilant can be a strength—it encourages saving and cautious spending. However, it can also lead to excessive frugality, financial anxiety, and reluctance to enjoy your hard-earned money.

To find balance:

  • Recognize when frugality becomes fear. If you feel guilty spending money on things that genuinely improve your life, it may be time to reassess your approach.

  • Budget for joy. Give yourself permission to spend on things that bring happiness. Set aside a 'fun fund' so you can enjoy your money without guilt.

  • Talk about money openly. If discussing finances makes you uncomfortable, practice having conversations about money with a trusted friend or advisor. Financial well-being includes open, healthy discussions about your resources.

Discovering Your Money Script

Most people exhibit a mix of these money scripts, influenced by childhood experiences, cultural norms, and personal history. To gain more clarity, ask yourself:

  • What lessons did I learn about money growing up?

  • Do I see money as something positive, negative, or stressful?

  • How does my money mindset impact my financial decisions today?

Flipping the Script

Identifying your money scripts is only the first step. Changing them requires self-awareness and a commitment to new financial habits. Start by:

  • Recognizing habit loops. Notice what you do when you’re stressed about money—do you shop impulsively? Do you avoid checking your accounts? Identifying these patterns can help you change them.

  • Experimenting with new behaviors. Try small shifts—like setting a 24-hour waiting period before purchases or automating savings—to see what changes your mindset in a positive way.

  • Seeking support when needed. If your money scripts feel deeply ingrained, consider working with a financial therapist or advisor who can help guide you toward healthier habits.

Final Thoughts

Your money script isn’t set in stone. With reflection, intention, and consistent effort, you can rewrite your financial story in a way that supports your goals and brings reassurance.

And if you need guidance along the way, we’re always here to help you navigate your financial journey.

Dan Olsen